As I mentioned a few days ago, The Man and I had a nice little SPAM party recently, for two. A SPAM party is when you have the pleasure of introducing one of America’s finest canned meat products to someone who has never tasted it before, such as, The Man.
I have fond childhood memories of fried SPAM sandwiches, followed by fond adult memories of SPAM sushi in Hawaii. They love SPAM in Hawaii. Who can blame them?
First, naturally, The Man needed some information. So, we inspected the can.
The can is chock full of interesting SPAM-toids (factoids for SPAM), such as the thickness one might cut the slices, and the direction in which one should cut the slices.
In addition, there are instructions for making a “SPAMburger” and some other fantastic product copy. For example, once you know how to make a SPAMburger: “You wield a delicious skill that has far-reaching consequences. Do not use it for evil.” SPAM writer, if you are reading this, well done! Oh yeah, and SPAM is gluten-free.
Some choice quotes from The Man as he inspected the can: “What’s in it? Is there liver in it?” (turning can around in his hands, looking for the ingredients list). “Pork with ham…” (contemplative expression), “Whatever that means.”
Next up, cooking technique. I’m sure there are dozens of ways to cook SPAM, or not cook SPAM (“You can eat it raw, right?”), and create a tasty meal. In fact, here is a collection of tantalizing SPAM recipes to peruse. “Polynesian Bake” sounds like a real winner. Let me know if you try that one.
In my family, we always cut the SPAM into slices (“Infant” width according to the label) and then fried them in a skillet for sandwiches, like so:
Then, depending on one’s mood, one would either slap the slices onto sandwich bread with mayo, catsup, and/or mustard, or get real creative and make SPAM appetizers with Ritz crackers and cheddar cheese. This made a fantastic snack for sitting in front of the TV watching American Bandstand or some PBS documentary about Florida’s Okefenokee Swamp, again, depending on one’s mood.
The Man’s final verdict? “Not bad. Not great. I was expecting it to be more…bland.”
I’d say that’s a great compliment to SPAM.